Hall of Shame

The initial Hall of Shame in Marhofn 38 generated lots of feedback. Two categories dominate the comments and complaints: Excess Tree Density and Get Off My Land, with only minor moans about Big Boring Bogs or Dull But Painless hills. A new category of Pretty but Painful has been introduced this year to deal with Watch Croft and Hutton Roof Crags. New nominations for 1999:

Excess Tree Density: Wentwood (32C)

John Abbott: I couldn't find the trig point.

Get Off My Land: Law Kneis (28B)

Chris Upson: Encountered a totally insane, violently abusive and threatening lunatic at the Deephope footbridge across the Ettrick Water by Law Kneis. Spent several fairly unpleasant minutes being violently threatened and abused and physically pushed around. Spent the afternoon travelling to Selkirk police station to give a statement and file a charge for assault. Then went back and bagged Law Kneis but by a different route - approaching it from the north-east.

Get Off My Land: Swinside (34B)

Chris Peart: Swinside has 'Private - No Right of Way' signs on every access point. I was in a hurry so gave it a miss but I'll be back.

Peter Wilson: Who owns this hill and why the need for so many Private notices? My ascent, a few years ago when the fence was down and felling was taking place, revealed two orienteering-type markers on and near the summit bearing the logo of HF Holidays who have a centre at the foot of the hill.

Ann Bowker: Swinside is owned by Lord Rochdale who also owns nearby Lingmoor Gardens which border a substantial chunk of Derwentwater shore. Shortly after his father died the new Lord Rochdale closed the gardens which used to be open to paying members of the public. He has also apparently renewed all the Private notices round Swinside. I also once saw HF markers on the hill but have not seen any since the Private signs were renewed. I go up regularly in the winter but avoid it in summer because of ticks and bracken. We have collected evidence of open access to the hill in the past. Baddeley's Guide to the Lake District of 1902 recommends Swinside as an easy stroll from Keswick. In Victorian times it was one of the seven 'stations' around Derwentwater which tourists visited for the view. And a very fine one it is. I mentioned this to a local historian who gave us a lecture on the fight for freedom to roam around Keswick on Latrigg and in Fawe Park which may well also be part of the Rochdale property. If access to Swinside was made impossible then I think we should organise similar protests but as things stand I find it rather delightful to have a Lake District hill which one can climb in complete solitude.

Get Off My Land: Seager Hill (38B)

David Purchase: Here I encountered by far the rudest landowner to date; what made this notable was that I was not trespassing, I was asking for permission at the Estate Office. Any visitors are strongly advised to visit from SO622379 and not from the north. Don't forget, there are twin tops and the trig point is not at either of them. (And do keep well clear of the pheasant shooting season.)

Big Boring Bogs: The Cheviot (33), Black Hill (36)

Chris Watson: The Cheviot is tamed by paving slabs, still pretty gooey though. It is an amazing sight. For over a mile, there are one metre by one metre stone slabs - taken from old mill floors, I believe. Because they are so big, they do not get forced down by passing walkers. It leaves Black Hill as the worst morass - my son was there recently and believes it is worse than Waun Fach although we haven't been to the latter for about ten years. I was on Kinder in 1996 and the summit was pretty dry - nothing like Black Hill which was awful in the 1960s when I climbed it! Buckden Pike is also getting very sticky around the top.

Pretty But Painful: Watch Croft (40)

John Abbott: I wore shorts when I climbed Watch Croft on an idyllic summer's evening. I was accompanied by my dog (normally a dim-witted creature) who refused to walk through the prickles surrounding the summit. Of course, I had to reach the trig point and so I carried her to the summit which caused puzzlement and amusement to a couple walking on a good path nearby. I was obviously in discomfort and I think they formed their own impression on which of us was the dim-witted creature.

Rob Woodall: Despite being a NT property there's no way across to the summit from the marked bridleway - other than to wade across the dwarf and western gorse - two small but determined species! The prickliest journey I've ever undertaken. To minimise the pain, leave the track about 200 metres S of the house, at SW418353 - the gorse is a bit shorter and there's a semblance of a path. To maximise the effect, do it in shorts and trainers. Nice view.

Pretty But Painful: Hutton Roof Crags (34D)

Dave Hewitt: Looks reasonable to start at the road junction to the north - under 100m ascent and along limestone pavements. Not so easy - plenty of limestone about but very bitty and completely clogged with shrubbery. Hardly any proper trees but lots of tiny ravines such that almost every direction felt like going across the grain of the land. Undergrowth was very tricky, plus several quite good paths all eventually disappeared into it very abruptly. We had started by heading along the Limestone Link path SE, and eventually found ourselves on the high ground SW of the 262m spot height - only a few metres lower than the summit but with the worst looking ravine this side of Borneo between us and the top. Gave it a halfhearted go but time was running out and we eventually had to cut back down. Even getting off wasn't easy - underfoot tended to be either slippery limestone or dense brambles/bracken - in the end followed a poor path down to Hutton Roof itself and walked back round by the road. At least we only got one drenching. Not even sure that the main top would be easy to locate - the Landranger still shows a trig but it has gone from the OL. Strange place - makes Torr Achilty look trivial. Next time I think I'll start from the south such that the main top is the first one reached. That whole plateau area where the name Hutton Roof Crags is on OS97 is as near as anything gets to being unwalkable. You'd never guess from the map that HRC is so difficult from this side.

David Purchase: I made the mistake of setting out for this hill from the north, in mist. This was not a good idea, as the terrain made any attempt to follow a bearing quite impossible. Keep this for a clear day, and keep as close as you can to the wall that passes west of the summit.

Peter Wilson: January 6th dawned overcast and wet in Grasmere so we headed south to the M6 and Hutton Roof village. Good path initially, then much scrub and limestone pavement caused a circuitous route to the trig column. But what a viewpoint. With the cloud easing from the Lakeland fells and the low lighting it seemed as if all the detail of Dow Crag's gullies and buttresses was visible. Within ten minutes of summit arrival, all the southern Lakes fells had cleared - Conistons, Langdales, Fairfield, Kentmere. We could even see the upper few hundred feet of Helm Crag above Grasmere. Then the Howgills cleared. Other Yorkshire and Bowland fells were reluctant to clear but the lower limestone hills around Morecambe Bay were all revealed and fortunately the M6 was hidden from sight. A really magnificent viewpoint.

Pretty But Painful: Grange Fell (28B), Hardown Hill (41)

Jon Metcalf: New hall of shame candidates Grange Fell and Hardown Hill, both on the grounds of shorts unfriendliness (abysmal thorns, even on a National Trust signed 'path' on the latter).

Shameless Summits

A few hills have attempted to emerge from the Hall of Shame during the year, with mixed success.

Hill of the Wangie (9A)

Alan Dawson: A very pleasant ascent through open woodland, but after half an hour of searching I still couldn't find the trig point. Shortly after getting home I discovered detailed instructions which Jon Metcalf had sent me months earlier but which I'd forgotten about.

Woodhead Hill (27C)

Peter Wilson: The comment in Marhofn 38 about Woodhead Hill is unjustified and incorrect - recent felling means the top is relatively easy to reach and there is a small cairn (assuming of course that the small cairn we found was the true summit).

David Purchase: This is not quite as difficult as Ken Whyte suggests. Yes, there is new planting, surrounded by a fence, but there is a gate at the SE corner, and the highest point is just outside (S of) the fence. It is worth going soon however, because when they fell the trees to the S of the summit the problems will be much greater.

Pen y Garn-goch (31C)

David Purchase: If this hill is in your Hall of Shame under Excess Tree Density, it can now be removed. The summit region has been felled, giving some pleasant views. But getting there (from the north) across the resulting debris was none too easy.

Mynydd Marchywel (32B)

Chris Peart: There is a track over the top along the district boundary, and the trig is in a large clearing.

David Purchase: I am not sure why this is classified as Excess Tree Density. There is a wide north-south track just east of the trig point, which itself is in an open clearing. Admittedly there is no view, and the area is flat, so you just rely on the 25K map to satisfy yourself that it is the summit. As I returned to the SSW I was greeted affably by the landowner and we had quite a long chat.

Dundry Down (41)

John Abbott: I feel as though I should defend Dundry Hill as I have lived most of my life in its shadow. Even now, I live within four miles of the Marilyn and much closer to the (more pleasant, less spoilt) eastern end of the hill. I have to concede that the immediate vicinity of the summit is a mess (old tractors, building debris, 'sludge' etc). It didn't smell (okay, so it was breezy) and the views of Bristol, South Wales, Somerset hills etc are as good as ever. Surely there are worse Marilyns? Am I being too protective of my local Marilyn?

Alan Dawson: Yes you are. Maybe there are worse, but unless there's been a big clean-up, it's still shameful.

David Purchase: I think its qualification for the Hall of Shame is at least marginal. If approached from the south you avoid all the nastiness in your photo and may not even be aware of it. I think Billinge Hill is much worse.

Alan Dawson: I don't. But then Billinge Hill used to be my local Marilyn, so perhaps I'm biased too.

Cliffe Hill (42)

David Purchase: Found a near-naked couple in the bushes not far from the road. After making lots of noise to warn them of my approach, I found that they were members of the cast changing for an evening performance at Glyndebourne.